Being a single mom means you’ve got your work cut out for you. That includes raising your kids, preparing for their future and, to say the least, looking for a lifelong partner who could help you in taking care of your kids, accept you and make you feel whole again.
Dating as a single mom is like starting from a scratch with a handful list of the “do’s and don’ts”. Because you’ve already learned from your misfortune past or poor decisions, it is now time to stand up, flip your hair and walk with grace and decisiveness.
But, how will you know if you are ready to play the “dating game”? Or, how do you get back in the dating game after a year or years of not paying attention in it? Take a look at these basic tips;
- Assess yourself. Are you physically, emotionally and mentally ready to date again? Reality check, there is a difference between “I just want to be in a relationship” to “I wanted to find the right person to spend my life with.” It’s fine to just date and enjoy but you may hurt yourself in the long run if you’re not holistically prepared to enter in a new commitment.
- Assess your kids. Assessing whether they miss having a father or not could be one of your indicators before dating. It is important to involve them in your decisions to avoid hurting or shocking them. Prepare and explain to them that your love and attention will not perish, nor, will be lessened. A father will also be good for them so they will have someone who could guide them and support them. Constant communication will also let you know what their sides are and what will be their future reaction. So, don’t skip this part. Respect your children so they will respect your decision as well.
- Go out and explore. Settling for one guy may not be your best option at the moment. Remember, you want to learn from history, not repeat them. Go out with your friends and have fun. Celebrate your single life and pray someone may notice it.
- Use dating apps. In the modern world today, dating is already a piece of cake through online dating apps. Even if you’re busy preparing for your kids or busy managing your business, dating is really possible. You can easily select a person you want to chat with or to have a dinner with. You can meet new people around the world and date as many as you want virtually or personally which is very perfect for a single mom like you.
- Be honest. In dating, honesty is the best policy. When the person you’re dating with knows your history and your kids and still accepts you, you’re in a good track. But that’s not it, it is more important that it is clear to your date that liking your kids isn’t the same as raising your kids because they are in a different level.
- Don’t talk about your past relationship while looking for the right person. It may sound good but there are instances in which a person will try to target your weak spot just to have a space in your heart. So, don’t look back and talk something else that would enlighten you about the person and let you decide whether he is genuine or not.
- Learn from your past and don’t rush yourself into a new relationship. Dating doesn’t mean you have to spend every hour with the person. It only means enjoying your time together while honoring your own time doing the things you love.